Escape to Paradise: Your Dream Italian Villa Awaits in Sellano!
Escape to Paradise: My Sellano Villa Dream (and the Reality Check!) - A Review That's Actually Real
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Alright, folks, buckle up. I just got back from, supposedly, the dreamiest getaway: Escape to Paradise in Sellano. The brochure promised rolling Umbrian hills, a villa straight outta a Fellini film, and enough pampering to make a Roman emperor blush. Did it deliver? Well… let’s just say it was a mixed bag, like a perfectly crafted tiramisu that accidentally gets dropped on the floor.
First Impressions: The View (OMG!) and the Stairs (Ugh!)
From the moment I stepped onto the terrace, my jaw did a swan dive. The view? Unforgettable. Seriously, postcard material. Lush green valleys stretching out forever, punctuated by those classic Italian hilltop towns. Forget about Instagram, I wanted to live in that picture.
But… and there's always a but, isn't there? The "Escape to Paradise" bit should have mentioned the sheer verticality of the place. The main building – yeah, that's where the magic happens. Getting there from my room felt like climbing Everest, especially after a few too many Aperol spritzes at the bar (more on that later). (Accessibility: Honestly, this place is not ideal if you have mobility issues. There's an elevator, yes, but it doesn't seem to service all floors, and the grounds are riddled with steps and uneven terrain. I'm reasonably fit, and I was panting.)
Room Rundown: Cozy, Comfy, and Questionable Lighting
Okay so the rooms! (Available in all rooms: Additional toilet, Air conditioning, Alarm clock, Bathrobes, Bathroom phone, Bathtub, Blackout curtains, Carpeting, Closet, Coffee/tea maker, Complimentary tea, Daily housekeeping, Desk, Extra long bed, Free bottled water, Hair dryer, High floor, In-room safe box, Interconnecting room(s) available, Internet access – LAN, Internet access – wireless, Ironing facilities, Laptop workspace, Linens, Mini bar, Mirror, Non-smoking, On-demand movies, Private bathroom, Reading light, Refrigerator, Safety/security feature, Satellite/cable channels, Scale, Seating area, Separate shower/bathtub, Shower, Slippers, Smoke detector, Socket near the bed, Sofa, Soundproofing, Telephone, Toiletries, Towels, Umbrella, Visual alarm, Wake-up service, Wi-Fi [free], Window that opens.)
My room was… fine. (Air conditioning: Hallelujah!) It was comfortable enough, the bed was enormous (Extra Long Bed!), and I loved the idea of the robes and slippers (Bathrobes, Slippers) BUT the lighting! Good lord, it was like a perpetual twilight. I swear, I spent half my vacation squinting. Trying to get ready in the morning? Forget it. My makeup skills were severely tested. I felt I was in a cave.
The Blackout curtains were a godsend though. So that's why I'm saying it was a mixed bag… The Daily housekeeping was perfect by the way!. A super plus!
Spa & Relaxation: A Glimpse of Paradise, then Reality Hits…
Now this is where they really tried to sell me the dream. (Things to do, ways to relax: Body scrub, Body wrap, Fitness center, Foot bath, Gym/fitness, Massage, Pool with view, Sauna, Spa, Spa/sauna, Steamroom, Swimming pool, Swimming pool [outdoor].
The spa itself? Gorgeous. The Pool with a View was as good as it sounds – infinity edge spilling out onto the landscape. (Sauna, Steamroom, Spa, Spa/sauna) The facilities, the Gym/fitness area, etc. were all pretty fancy. They had Massage, Body scrub, Body wrap… like seriously luxurious sounding treatments. I was ready to become a spa goddess.
But then there were the appointments… I booked a body wrap (because, hello, Italian holiday!), and it started off great. The masseuse was lovely, and I began to drift off… until the radio started skipping. And the music looped constantly, then it stopped and was silence. I thought I was in a horror movie and waiting for the axe grinder. I swear, a pigeon even got in there! (Or, you know, that's how it felt in the moment.)
(Fitness center: It existed. I didn't. Let's leave it at that.)
Food & Drink: A Culinary Adventure, With Some Hiccups!
The dining experience was, overall, pretty good. (Dining, drinking, and snacking: A la carte in restaurant, Alternative meal arrangement, Asian breakfast, Asian cuisine in restaurant, Bar, Bottle of water, Breakfast [buffet], Breakfast service, Buffet in restaurant, Coffee/tea in restaurant, Coffee shop, Desserts in restaurant, Happy hour, International cuisine in restaurant, Poolside bar, Restaurants, Room service [24-hour], Salad in restaurant, Snack bar, Soup in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant, Western breakfast, Western cuisine in restaurant.)
The Breakfast [buffet] was a decent spread, with plenty of pastries, fresh fruit, and even some questionable attempts at "Asian breakfast." The Coffee/tea in restaurant, was on point, and they kept the Bottle of water flowing. The Happy hour at the poolside bar was a MUST. Seriously, the Poolside bar was a godsend. Watching that sun dip below the horizon, sipping on an Aperol Spritz? Pure bliss.
The main restaurant, with its stunning views, was pretty good. I was really hoping for a truly spectacular food experience, a moment of culinary perfection. But the food, it was… consistent. The flavors were simple and authentic, really tasty, and most of the time, it was delicious. I could have killed for the soups on offer and all of the bread. However, service wasn't the most attentive… it was always someone different… and it took ages to get a water refill sometimes. (A la carte in restaurant, Restaurants, Salad in restaurant, Soup in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant, Western breakfast, Western cuisine in restaurant)
I gave my feedback about the service towards the end of the trip after I got to know the main server.
Cleanliness & Safety: COVID-Conscious (Mostly)
(Cleanliness and safety: Anti-viral cleaning products, Breakfast in room, Breakfast takeaway service, Cashless payment service, Daily disinfection in common areas, Doctor/nurse on call, First aid kit, Hand sanitizer, Hot water linen and laundry washing, Hygiene certification, Individually-wrapped food options, Physical distancing of at least 1 meter, Professional-grade sanitizing services, Room sanitization opt-out available, Rooms sanitized between stays, Safe dining setup, Sanitized kitchen and tableware items, Shared stationery removed, Staff trained in safety protocol, Sterilizing equipment)
They were trying, bless their hearts. Lots of hand sanitizer, visible cleaning happening, and a decent attempt at social distancing. (Staff trained in safety protocol) I appreciated the effort, and it made me feel somewhat safe. I noticed though that they weren't always perfect by the way.
(Room sanitization opt-out available: I don’t know, I didn't ask… it seems to be the norm now)
Services & Conveniences: Hit or Miss
(Services and conveniences: Air conditioning in public area, Audio-visual equipment for special events, Business facilities, Cash withdrawal, Concierge, Contactless check-in/out, Convenience store, Currency exchange, Daily housekeeping, Doorman, Dry cleaning, Elevator, Essential condiments, Facilities for disabled guests, Food delivery, Gift/souvenir shop,Indoor venue for special events, Invoice provided, Ironing service, Laundry service, Luggage storage, Meeting/banquet facilities, Meetings, Meeting stationery, On-site event hosting, Outdoor venue for special events, Projector/LED display, Safety deposit boxes, Seminars, Shrine, Smoking area, Terrace, Wi-Fi for special events, Xerox/fax in business center)
The Concierge was helpful, but sometimes difficult to find. The Wi-Fi [free] worked, but was patchy in certain areas. (Wi-Fi in public areas: yes, Wi-Fi for special events: I didn't attend any, so I can't say!). The Dry cleaning was crazy expensive!
(Food delivery, Gift/souvenir shop, Convenience store - didn’t see any!)
For the Kids: More of a "Quiet Child" Zone
(For the kids: Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal)
I didn't have kids with me, but, I could see that this place wouldn't be ideal for them. The facilities for kids were minimal, and the vibe was… adult. I'd describe this more as a "romantic couple's retreat" than a family holiday. (Babysitting service: I didn’t check this out!)
**Getting Around: Pretty Much Trapped (Unless
Escape to Paradise: Belvilla's Ca Bianca, Montefiore Conca, Italy Awaits!
Alright, buckle up buttercups, because we're about to dive headfirst into my Belvilla by OYO adventure in Fonni Blu Sellano, Italy. Prepare yourself, because this isn't a polished travel brochure - this is the real, unedited, slightly-caffeinated me.
Day 1: Arrival and the Curse of the Luggage
- Morning (Around 8 AM - If the flight wasn't delayed): Oh sweet, sweet Sardinia! The anticipation was KILLING me on the flight. Landed at Olbia, and the first hurdle? The luggage carousel. Seriously, why does it always feel like a lottery? You're just standing there, eyes glued, praying your suitcase isn't taking a scenic route to… I don't know, Iceland? Mine, thankfully, appeared. But my sanity? Well, let's just say it's still unpacking.
- Midday (Around 12 PM - Post Car Rental Meltdown): The car rental experience. Ugh. Let's just say I now know the Italian word for "unnecessary paperwork." Finally, triumph! (a tiny Fiat 500 - pray for me on those mountain roads). The drive to Fonni… breathtaking. Seriously, the jagged peaks, the emerald valleys, it was giving me serious Eat Pray Love vibes. Except, you know, with less existential dread and more "OMG, are those sheep on the road?!"
- Afternoon (Around 3 PM - Belvilla Check-In & Instant Gratification): Arrived at Fonni Blu Sellano. The place looked even better than the photos (and sometimes, I'm skeptical of those). Beautiful spot, it felt like I had a whole mountain to myself. Dropped the bags. The first order of business? The balcony. Wine, cheese, and the Sardinian sunset. Bingo. The world's to-do list immediately evaporated.
- Evening (Around 7 PM - The Hunt for Dinner): Finding a restaurant. This is where things got interesting. Google maps? Lies. Every single place I wanted to visit was closed. Italian siesta seemed to be a serious thing in Fonni. Finally stumbled upon a tiny trattoria. "Mama Mia" authentic, and I’m pretty sure I ate enough pasta to feed a small village. The waiter was a gruff-but-charming old guy who kept calling me 'bella'. I'm pretty sure he was flirting, and I loved it.
Day 2: Mountain Highs and Culinary Lows?
- Morning (Around 9 AM - Attempt at Mountain Trekking in the Sella Pass): Feeling ambitious. Decided to be all active and go for a hike. The mountain air was so crisp, it was like breathing liquid sunshine. The hike was supposed to be "moderate." Liars. It was a vertical climb of doom. My thighs are still screaming. The views at the top, though? Worth every aching muscle.
- Midday (Around 1 PM - The Quest for Good Food): Food. Still a dominant theme. I had to find a good restaurant. After my lunch, I spent half an hour in the car trying to find a place, and finally settled in a tourist trap for lunch. It was truly mediocre. I'm starting to think fine dining isn't a thing in Fonni. Or maybe I just haven't found the secret spot yet.
- Afternoon (Around 4 PM - Exploring the Town): Exploring Fonni – the main square, the narrow streets, the old cathedral. It felt like stepping back in time. Spotted a cute little vintage shop, and nearly blew my entire budget on a ceramic donkey (don't judge). The people were super friendly. Gestures speak louder than words, I will say.
- Evening (Around 7 PM - The 'I Survived' Aperitivo): Rewarded myself with an Aperitivo. The drinks were strong, the snacks (olives, cheese, little sandwiches) were a-ma-zing. Watched the sunset over the mountains, and felt a profound sense of peace. I survived.
Day 3: The Cheese Crisis and the Road to Redemption
- Morning (Around 9 AM - The Case of the Missing Cheese): Woke up with a hankering for cheese. But my cheese supplies appeared to have mysteriously vanished. I'm blaming the gremlins. Or maybe I ate it all last night. Either way, a cheese emergency of epic proportions.
- Midday (Around 12 PM - Road Trip to Nuoro and Search for Real Cheese): Needed cheese. Needed it badly. Jumped in my tiny Fiat and drove to Nuoro, the regional capital. Found a glorious market. Found real cheese. Rejoiced. Also bought some local honey and a weird-looking cured sausage I'm slightly terrified to try.
- Afternoon (Around 3 PM - The Art Attack): Nuoro is a town full of culture. I went to the Museo Etnografico. Fascinating stuff. Saw some traditional Sardinian masks that gave me the creeps but were somehow beautiful. I'm not a huge museum person, but this was genuinely interesting.
- Evening (Around 7 PM - The Triumph of Dinner): Found a restaurant in Nuoro that had decent reviews and was worth the trip. I had a pasta dish with wild boar ragu. Heaven. Finally, culinary redemption! Ate the rest of the cheese.
Day 4: Lake Adventure / My Love Affair with the Mountains
- Morning (Around 9 AM - Lake Gusana): Decided to visit Lake Gusana. Drove there. Breathtaking. Felt so small, so insignificant, under the looming mountains. Took some photos. Did some thinking.
- Midday (Around 12 PM - Mountains are Calling Again): The mountains are calling. And I must go. Did another smaller hike. I feel like I’m in a painting. Or a postcard. Either way, perfect.
- Afternoon (Around 3 PM - Relax or More adventure?): Spent some time on the balcony, reading. I actually managed to relax. I feel relaxed, I feel happy.
- Evening (Around 7 PM - The Last Aperitivo): I went back to my favourite square for one last aperitivo. Tonight, I'm watching the sun set.
Day 5: Departure and the Sadness… but also, the souvenirs!
- Morning (Around 8 AM - Packing… the Struggle is Real): Packing. The eternal vacation enemy. Tried to cram everything into my suitcase. Failed. Of course. Had to sit on it to zip it shut. Praying it doesn't explode at the airport.
- Midday (Around 11 AM - Goodbye Fonni): Last look at the mountains. Said goodbye to Fonni Blu Sellano. I’m going to miss this place. I'm going to miss the mountains.
- Afternoon (Around 2 PM - Airport Chaos): Airport… Oh, the airport. Hoping the flight isn’t delayed.
- Evening (Onwards?): Headed back to reality with a suitcase full of Italian goodies, memories, and the lingering taste of Sardinian sunshine.
This trip was a rollercoaster. The food was, at times, a letdown. The hiking almost killed me. But the landscape, the people, and the feeling of being utterly disconnected from the real world? Unforgettable. Sardinia, you've stolen a piece of my heart. And that ceramic donkey is now the star of my living room. Until next time, Italia!
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Escape to Paradise: Your Dream Italian Villa Awaits... Seriously! (FAQ - with a Side of Chaos)
Okay, so "Escape to Paradise" sounds... optimistic. Is this villa seriously *that* amazing? Lay it on me, warts and all.
Alright, alright, let's ditch the rose-tinted glasses for a sec. "Paradise"? Well, it's mostly paradise. Think less perfectly manicured Instagram and more… rustic charm that occasionally involves a rogue spider the size of a small car. But seriously, YES. It's amazing. The views alone… I remember the first time I saw them, I actually started bawling. Not a sob, mind you, more of a… a little gasp of pure awe that turned into leaky eyes. And those sunsets? Forget about it. Prepare to become ridiculously dramatic about sunsets. The villa itself? Old, absolutely. Creaky floors, questionable plumbing sometimes (more on that later), but SO full of character. Think of it as a slightly eccentric, incredibly charming Italian grandmother. Okay? You're warned.
What's the deal with the "rustic charm" you mentioned? Be specific. What's broken? What's charmingly broken?
Okay, deep breaths. The "rustic charm" is a euphemism. Think: a washing machine that only works if you whisper sweet nothings to it. The dishwasher? More decorative than functional, honestly. We've had guests who swore they could hear it plotting world domination (it’s a very dramatic machine, I tell you). The plumbing? Well, let's just say you'll learn the true meaning of the phrase "water pressure." And the hot water? Sometimes you get a scalding flood, sometimes a lukewarm trickle. But! The brokenness is part of the charm. It forces you to relax, embrace the chaos, and learn to *appreciate* a lukewarm shower. We've got a local handyman, Marco, who is basically a miracle worker. He's fixed everything...eventually. Plus he makes amazing espresso. So...there's always that. He's a treasure, that Marco.
Tell me about the location, really. Is this "secluded" or "middle-of-nowhere-with-limited-Wi-Fi"?
Okay, be honest, limited Wi-Fi is the true terror, right?! Sellano is a stunning spot, yes. But yes. It's a bit of both. Secluded, yes. The nearest grocery store is a scenic (and winding) 20-minute drive... which means you better remember the olive oil on your first trip! Wi-Fi? We try our best, but remember, *this is Italy*. It’s working, but don't plan on streaming 4K movies all day. Embrace the digital detox! Read a real book! Talk to your family! (Gasp!) There's a small cafe in town with, surprisingly, better Wi-Fi than the villa sometimes, although it's best enjoyed with a cappuccino and a chat with the incredibly sweet owner, Maria. She'll tell you all about the town gossip, which is far more entertaining than anything Netflix has to offer, I promise.
Is the kitchen fully equipped? I'm envisioning myself cooking pasta with fresh local ingredients.
The kitchen is… equipped. It has… things. Pots, pans, utensils, plates, the basics. Yes, you *can* cook delicious pasta. You *will* want to cook pasta. The local ingredients are INSANE. The tomatoes? Sweetest things I've ever tasted. The basil? You can smell it from a mile away. The olive oil? Liquid gold. But… don't expect professional chef-grade equipment. It's a home kitchen. Get ready to get creative, embrace the imperfections, and probably burn a few things. My first attempt at a simple tomato sauce resulted in smoke billowing from the windows and a small fire. Okay, maybe a slightly bigger fire. But it was delicious, I swear! The point is, it teaches you to be more... relaxed. And maybe keep a fire extinguisher handy.
What's there to *do* in Sellano and the surrounding area? Aside from eating pasta (which, let's be honest, is a major draw).
Okay, so you're not just there to gorge yourself on pasta (though *highly* encouraged)? Smart. Sellano offers stunning hikes for days. There's a via ferrata, if you're feeling adventurous (I am NOT). Explore the surrounding towns! Spello for the flower festivals! Assisi, of course! Norcia (for the best cured meats EVER - seriously, I'd happily risk an early heart attack for some of that prosciutto). Day trips to Perugia (chocolate!). Seriously, you'll need a month just to scratch the surface. But, honestly? Some of the best days were spent just… wandering. Getting lost in the tiny alleyways of Sellano, chatting with the locals (even if you only know a few words of Italian), and soaking up the atmosphere. Just breathe it in. And don't forget the gelato. LOTS of gelato.
How do I get to the villa? Are we talking about a terrifyingly narrow mountain road?
Okay, this is important. The roads are… "characterful." Think winding, yes. Narrow, maybe. Steep, occasionally. But manageable. You absolutely need a car. And I'd recommend a smaller one. And… take it slow. There's a reason Italians drive like they do – they've been doing it for centuries! The GPS might take you on a detour down a goat path at some point, but don't panic. Just enjoy the scenery. And the views...oh my god. It's worth it. I remember the first time I drove the route. I was convinced I was going to die, but then I rounded a bend, and BAM! The valley opened up. It was... surreal. I pulled over and just stared for like half an hour, completely speechless. So yes, the road can be a bit of an adventure, but the destination makes it worth the white knuckles. Really, it does. Just… don't drive it at night if you can help it, especially after a few glasses of wine. Or a few *hundred*. (kidding...mostly)
What's the best time of year to visit?
That's the beauty of it! I personally love the shoulder seasons. Spring and Autumn. Think sunny days, fewer tourists, and the most gorgeous colors. Summer's hot, and the locals are on holiday, so it can get busy. But the evenings are amazing. And in winter? Snow! And the magic of Christmas markets and cozy fires. Truly depends on what you like. Me? I'm a sucker for Autumn. The scent of woodsmoke in the air, the vineyards turning gold, the truffles… Oh, the truffles. I could write a whole other FAQ just about the truffles! (Maybe I will…)
